Need more details on whether it fails only in one direction, which device is affected and what it runs (e.g. Desktop OS, Android version), if it fails with other large profiles, whether it fails with new profiles and so on.
It might also be solved with an update of Iroh from 0.35 to 1.0.
Since in your case it fails to even connect, and not times out later during the transfer, it looks like a problem with a firewall on your laptop. When you transfer from a laptop to the phone, phone connects to the laptop, and if the laptop blocks incoming connections, you cannot transfer backups in this direction.
CachyOS wiki says firewall is enabled by default: Post Install | CachyOS
You can try to disable ufw temporarily or allow all incoming UDP connections.